I can’t begin to understand why life is the way it is and why people, including myself, have such a tough time figuring out how to navigate the terrain. I mean, there have been so many before us who have shared their experience, insights, wisdom and guidance, yet we still struggle just as much or more. We continue to pour ourselves into so much that is so meaningless and yet put such value on it. The movie, the Matrix seems so dead on to me. We are running around pursuing so much, so fast and even though we have more knowledge, more resources, we are sicker than ever. We don’t have a clue of who we really are, but if we are willing, I believe, we can begin to know. We can begin to really live.
In my personal experience, it has taken great adversity and pain to produce true desire to seek life. Brain cancer and loss of my best friend, my girl was the catalyst that has both devastated me and brought me to a place of seeking; a drive to know my identity, my purpose, my place in this grand plan of a loving God and creator of all that is and all that has ever been and all that ever will be. This drive has been accompanied with the courage to face my fears and a desire to open myself up to full examination of my deep heart to include my desires, hopes, dreams, motives, dissappointments and beliefs. In this process I am finding a very real and very personal love is guiding me and revealing that which I seek. I am finding the uniqueness of who I am and the great love that knows me like no other, that continues to provide just what I need, in just the right way at just the right time to bring me even closer.
Today, I have life and I am grateful. I am learning there is no other way but to be real, to be authentic, to be honest with myself and others. I must acknowledge my feelings, identify my shortcomings and seek life at all costs. Today is all I have and it is a gift that I cherish. Life is worth it!
Doug